831. Is She Pulling His Leg?


831. It was 2 a.m. He awoke, howling. A cramp had curled all his toes and his entire right foot into a knot as hard as any knot in any hardwood tree. He downed the small glass of salt water sitting on the nightstand. Nothing happened. He didn't bother trying to stand on the ballerina‐like foot. He didn't bother trying to massage it. After a minute, his toes and foot relaxed. Salt water no longer worked; magnesium pills no longer worked. Later, he called his sister. Bev said, "Well, what worked for me for a while was bananas." Ray said, "I eat a banana every day." Bev said, "Try waiting until they turn brown." Ray said, "Okay. Anything else?" She said, "You could try sleeping with a bar of soap under your mattress." He laughed. "Really?! Any particular brand? How could that possibly work?" She said, "Mind over mattress, I guess." 2.9

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